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1. What was actually the first hotel in Las Vegas?
Who the fuck cares what the first hotel was! You are asking the Jew, do you
really think we care. Trust me, all the money from that place has already been
spent, so we
are no longer interested. Just like if you come here and lose all of your money,
we will no longer be interested in you either, you
inquisitive son-of-a-bitch. Oh, by the way, it was Hotel
Nevada, now know as the Golden Gate - 1905. It was also
the 1st telephone and the # was '1'.
2. I heard that the casinos don't really give comps anymore. Are there any
freebies left?
If you play they will pay. The
casinos still give freebies. That has never changed. You
just don't get free shit for being a cheap fuck is all.
You won't get a free dinner or room for playing $10 in a
nickel machine. Besides if your gambling the money away,
your really not getting anything for free are you? That
is why the trick is to win, if you win they will still
give you the free shit and it now it doesn't cost you
anything. Your best chance at free stuff on the strip is
to come during the week, not on weekends and have a
couple hot girls on your arm. If you are too ugly to
achieve this then I would recommend the local casinos
where the comps are a little looser.
3. Is there really a Sin City Beer and is it any good?
Yes and all beer is good if you have enough of it. Just as good as that 300
pound girl you banged that one night at the party. It was good enough for
you because you did it but not something you brag about. Our whores are
better but either way, you still have that hung-over feeling afterward.
4. Where is a good (and cheap) place to stay?
Downtown, or any street corner for that matter! If you are cheap, we don't
want you anyway. Go to an Indian Casino and go be their pain in the ass.
Better yet, get a better job so you don't have to be cheap. I would suggest
Terribles, The Orleans, or the Suncoast.
5. I have never been to Vegas, how Hot does it get there in the summer?
You obviously have access to weather.com if you sent
me this question you laxly son-of-a-bitch. Don't you think it would have been
faster to look there than to bother me. You are talking about the middle of
the fucking desert. What part of that don't you understand? I'll tell you
what, go buy an industrial strength hair dryer, turn it on high and leave it
pointing into your face for 3 months. That should give you a minor
understanding. However just like in question 3, with enough alcohol it
doesn't get very hot here at all. Only 115 in the summer!
- Lil' Jew
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